what does love mean to you in 2023?

Z: To me, love means childlike wonder and safety. I think love is the ability to explore and be curious about yourself, as well as other people while feeling safe in each other's presence..

our pride campaign this year revolves around the theme 'Come Together.' what does that mean to you?

Z: The first memory that comes to mind is organising raves at Bussy Temple, a space centred around queer, trans, and femme individuals. It started organically when we found a public space in Singapore, and ended up just gathering together. What started with small portable speakers, eventually grew into finding DJs (within the community). We wanted to create an inclusive space, free from the presence of straight men or cis gay men at traditional bars.

There is so much power in just gathering in a rave space like Bussy Temple. When you see how different bodies move in a space when they feel safe, it's like unlocking new pathways to navigate the world.

While traditional avenues for protest and change may be limited locally, spaces like Bussy Temple hold no rules on how "weird" one can be. It's a realm of experimentation, where dressing up and looking unconventional is celebrated.

can you share a special message or advice for others in lgbtqia+ community in singapore?

Z: What comes to mind was a moment I shared with my best friend/queer kin/ride or die, Kate.

During the pandemic when I just started therapy, I was uncovering a lot of past traumas. There was a moment when we were watching a random movie and my body was suddenly triggered. I just started bawling out about a traumatic experience from my childhood past.. Kate showed me so much love and compassion, and I shared with her something I never shared with anyone else – something I thought I’d bring to my grave.

My therapist called that a ‘corrective experience’ for me. Kate has been such a big influence on my life. Our queer platonic kinship has let me see what a healthy relationship is, and what safety/nurture/care/joy looks like in a relationship. More importantly, she showed me how to love myself before I was able to.

how has the sense of community and support played a role in helping you navigate the challenges and prejudices faced by the LGBTQIA+ community in singapore?

Z: The community/spaces you inhabit always serve as accountabilities to either enable or limit you to be. I think as I put in the work and worked on my traumas through therapy, I have been attracting the best queer kins and collaborators who see the expansiveness of queerness the same way I do.

I am now unapologetic about my queerness when navigating the cis-herero world, and my community of friends have played a huge role in that.

can you share a message or advice for others in the lgbtqia+ community in singapore?

Z: I'd like to quote my friend Nora, who said "Reality is temporary, but fantasies are forever." I think people in the LGBTQIA+ community are often too tense and serious, focusing on what's lacking and the traumas imposed by societal systems. We forget to have fun, and understand that life is temporary and not as serious. We forget to fantasise. One needs to be a little delusional to enact change.